Canopy Literary Review

Blueberry Poems

The clam-digger, blueberry raker, 
the lobsterman – bending down

Blueberry Poems

Thomas Hiscock

Photo by Keith Luke

Blueberry Poem #1

Skeleton matches

Striking flintlock pistols from the

Old West of a nation that itself is a

New West.

I don’t remember what you said.

I don’t remember anything they told me…

Only the gasp of the warm, clean sun – split in two…

Jumping spiders…

Iris audience in front;

Blueberries, stepping back.

 

 

Blueberry Poem #2

The clam-digger, blueberry raker,

the lobsterman – bending down to grab

nutrients from

the cold Atlantic green / white waves, white

water; white mouth – dead daughter.

Scoliosis – breaking for self and other.

“I’d bend over backwards!”

More pain going forward – in future… staring at the ground

till you walk into traffic…

Arched back – eyeing the sky,

how you love it.

***

Smashed so many fireflies in a jar;

Smashed it on the ground!

Exploding gold and creeping legs –

Stitch you up with lacewing flies.

***

Electrolysis grin

Hair sprouting behind my eyes

***

 

 

Gnawing

***

Grabbing jawbones you said

Disappear!

I ran to the dock /

my feet hit the sea

flying dreaming tumbling /

this hell, childhood …

I don’t think we have the same conception of space

I don’t think we understand anything …

I’ll die here.

Running / chewing metal instead of blood

Past cars /

City blue

Panic streaming through

everywhere everything everyone

***

 

 

Crawling

Black flies in my nose

Huffing delight

Insanity … shambles / disgorging

There’s scorn inside my heart

It wiggles … like flesh;

carpets my mouth…

Frail moon tongue.

Daggers pierce what can’t be sewn.

***

Wind is blowing now,

shame —

Your head on a fucking post.

***

THOMAS HISCOCK is a writer and musician from Falmouth, Maine. Inspired by his coastal home, Buddhist faith, and medical duress – Thomas hopes to turn tragedy into majesty, capturing dark stories in a gilded cage. A fearless young writer, Thomas’s work has been published in newspapers, magazines, blogs, zines, newsletters, websites, anthologies, and more.

Three Images

VANTAGE is an explorer, photographer, artist and writer. Instagram – @_vantage1_ Link Instagram

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Solstice

Solstice

Juliette Alfier

Shore

Some women’s voices

are heavy with stories

of men who never make it home.

Their oaths unbraid

in unguessed fellowships,

regions where fists

circle shot glasses

like shipwrecked souls

reaching for shore.

*

In a diner window booth,

a child bored with the adult-speak

of her father and his friends,

presses her face to the pane.

She watches shadows pass.

Like the stripclub dancer

yet to be embellished

in fishnets and slit-gown,

who will, in some small hour, whisper

in a man’s ear,

I am everything

you cannot touch.

Photo by 良太郎 空

One Way to Deflect the Perfection of Allegory

after Brigit Pegeen Kelly

When she’d ask for candy,

she’d get a rusty tin of marbles.

For test scores good enough to skip a grade,

her father’s wartime fear of falling.

For insight into the future, a ghostship

leaving a harbor seen only in a dream;

a red scarf blowing past her window.

For a clear autumn day, cool and windy,

a greenhouse trapped in steam.

When she sought intercessory prayer for a dying brother,

she got a requiem for sparrows.

For a way to leave town forever,

her face staring back from a china plate,

her mother licking honey off a carving knife.

Solstice

Come this overdue season, I’ll breathe Yes when it arrives steeped in sunheat. I’ll breathe yes to the warming rains, rivulets turning to steam on the asphalt lot of the dead box store where lovers and dopers shield themselves in shadow. I’ll acquiesce to the crows, their dull wings invading my street, dim beaks craving the shiny coins that fill no one’s pockets now.

I’ll even give a nod to the sundress that mom

could at least have washed after filching it

from the Good Will bin. Afterwards,

I’ll say yes to trespass a private beach,

slink through sand threaded with lost sandals

and seawrack, a handbag snug beneath my arm

to slip gin beyond the No Alcohol sign.

Yet I’ll fail to answer the herring gulls

leveling in wind to drop clams that’ll burst

on the anvil of stone walkways to feed hatchlings

recessed on the roof of a seaside motel,

their mouths tangled in hunger far beyond my sight.

JULIETTE ALFIER’s (she/her) most recent book of poetry is The Shadow Field. Journal credits include Copper Nickel, Faultline, Fugue, Notre Dame Review, Penn Review, River Styx, and Vassar Review. She is also a collage artist after the styles of Francesca Woodman, and Katrien De Blauwer.

The forest files a missing persons report

species: human
last seen: believing ownership was another word for love
distinguishing marks: pockets full of plastic weather

The forest files a missing persons report

Collins C. Oparaocha

Photo by Luis Del Río Camacho
The forest files a missing persons report

```
species:                              human
last seen:                         believing ownership was another word for love
distinguishing marks: pockets full of plastic weather
```
The cedar says:

They stopped calling me by my name. They stopped saying my names.
Before we ceased to say theirs.

Meanwhile—

a glacier misplaces
another century.

An owl edits
Close to the edge of night.

The river returns
every apology
unopened.

```
[please check one]
```
☐ extinct
☐ endangered
☐ remembering

The moss votes
for softness.

The wolves
abstain.

Every tree ring
contains the minutes
from meetings
We never got invited to.

At dawn,

the wind seals the book,

not because
the search is over—

because the missing

are still

walking.


When the Fungi Began Correcting Our Grammar First, they objected to the sentence: The earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof. A long white thread crossed it out. Then another. Soon the forest floor became one enormous revision. ``` replace belongs with breathes through replace resource with relative delete the word forever ``` Beneath our boots, mycelium continued writing without ink, without witnesses, without needing our agreement. One morning, I placed my ear against the ground. The soil said, not in language— in recurrence. Everything fallen was already becoming its next beautiful sentence.

COLLINS C. OPARAOCHA is a writer and poet. He lives and writes in Turkey. His work has appeared or forthcoming in Empyrean literary magazine, Abstract Magazine, Dualiterary Magazine, Merion West magazine, Pink Ochre Literary Magazine, Still Point: Poetry & Culture, Homeplace Magazine, Blue Daisies Journal, The Quasar Review, Abundance Literary Magazine, and he is the author of the novel All Shadows are Black.

Canopy One

Welcome to Canopy Literary Review. This journal came about after a yearlong search for publications of its

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Personne

Odile stood in the darkest part of the yard, waiting, waiting, and Boy was nowhere in sight.

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Inanition: Large Body Behind My Intricate Mind

My body laid against the pillows
damned,
yearning to get out of these years of motion interpolation
yet nothing is moving.

Inanition: Large Body Behind My Intricate Mind

Photo by Heather Green

My body laid against the pillows
damned,
yearning to get out of these years of motion interpolation
yet nothing is moving.
I see the roof colored a pastel beige
memorizing cracks upon cracks
the crevices in my body swindling the air that hadn’t
existed in my bedroom beforehand.

The bags I hid in that thrifted cubby
years of suppression not ready to confront—only my eyes
saw the bright colors and volume of food
poison arrow shot from my
heart every time
guilt stepped into my eyes and
saw my frame.
Heart sank, yet stomach rang
needed to
fill up the repulsion all over again
to feel satisfied and barely happy.

Here I am, defined by state of mind
wilted like the roses by gravestones I’d seen—families, friends hadn’t visited for years—
chugging, chugging, chugging on honeyed carbonation,
aromantic in decision-making.

Things Rotting on the Sides of Highways

McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger   450 Calories

Red Bull Sea Blue   160 Calories

Pepsi   250 Calories

Takis Fuego   560 Calories

Lay’s Salt & Vinegar   450 Calories

Starbucks Caramel Macchiato   250 Calories

Water Bottles   0 Calories

Little Debbie Zebra Cake Roll’s   320 Calories

Maruchan Chicken Flavored Ramen.  380 Calories

Mountain Dew Code Red   280 Calories

= 3,100 Calories.

Who’s at the door?

Plump
Corpulent
Chubby
Fat
Round
Pudgy
Husky
Podgy

Ripe

Repletive
Repulsive
Flabby
Brawny
What I’ve always seen on the other side
I’ve never had the pleasure:

Lank.

Scrawny.

Muscular.

Slender.

Emaciated.

Pinched.

Willowy.

My wishes are defined in this multitude of ways.
Never learned how to balance many things happening at once
my weight just one issue of many during my teenage years.
Living paycheck to paycheck—the American dream—like society and corporate food-service steamy fast-food restaurants
coworkers I’d lost—hiring and firing—
for convenience.
One was found slumped over in the bathroom
another I took home where her brother lives just a few blocks from me
I haven’t seen her since.
I remember the time I snuck $32 worth of food home and ate it all in one sitting.

Got so caught up with my co-working kindreds—correspondence in a beehive—connected through the contents of our wallets—commensurate with our abilities—stuck like pieces played in a game of Tetris, never to move again.

Belle Epoque could’ve been me had I never ate all that cake and got complacent—damn, masculinity is such a bitch—so was I.
All of us feel something is wrong with us
we take that art and form it into emotion.
Food was an outlet—it let me out,
pushed me out, completely fucked me over—

physically
mentally
emotionally—

exhausted me
made me full
energized, at times.
Food can help, and can kill you in the long run—hypocritical juxtaposition—
perhaps
I’ll never get over it.
Food as art grows a better person—fed up with the drainage
the bad kinds, at least.

Artistic Development In all us fucked up people

Vincent van Gogh – The Potato Eaters

Celeste Roberge – The Weight of Grief
Felix Gonzalez-Torres – Untitled

Andy Warhol – Campbell’s Soup Cans

Francis Bacon – Figure with Meat

Giuseppe Arcimboldo – Vertumnus

Pieter Bruegel the Elder – The Peasant Wedding

Vincent van Gogh – Still Life with Apples

The bond between my bed and I grew my legs huge
my steps resounded in the doorway.
Forget trying to sneak out.
Wouldn’t be worth a damn.
It’s like the bond I could’ve had with a Golden Retriever or a Husky—a healthy bond that would’ve had me up and feeling loved
freed from confinement, shackles chewed through by canine incisors.
But.
No.
That never happened.

 

Conformed to comfort, I decided everything in my life
had been done and over with at this point
my bed my fetter and drug.
I hit the curb
hard
like a tooth chipped off from impact

circumscription of forgetting how to move

how to feel     how to cope

have

friends

have anything something

anything?

I was bound for the floor as I’d become to my bed
floor comfort
floor solace
yet my enemy in disguise built me into a person shamed
my extremities in quantity not quality
full but never filled
never myself.

Enigmatic in the way I quickly ran for comfort of home
of the multitude of excuses

I a mammoth

Tremendous

Staggering

Voluminous

frozen

in a lake

chalked up, nothing of significance

at least, that’s how the teenagers treated me.
I don’t blame them though

I don’t know how to feel about it

tossed away into the nethermost,

that planet earth had never seen.

Wrappers and plastic cups

riddling the earth of environmental damage—

they were my friends instead—

I saw them everyday.

Coping Mechanisms Through Song Titles: Stinging Resonance in Heart-Sinking Awareness

Lullaby For Liquid Pig

Hearts Are Open Graves

Feel So Numb

A Box Full of Sharp Objects

<maybe> it’s my fault

Eat You Alive

I Hate Everything About You

you should see me in a crown

Human Leech

Nobody Asked Me (If I Was Okay)

Hurt

And Contentment

Arrested in shame and accountability
once I stepped out of the environment
the city that’d entrapped me for so long.
The smell in that room enraptured my soul
lead it towards a bewitching spell

of laughter
happiness
freedom—
could’ve all.
Craft of recognition drank in bottles of sugar—
sodas and lemonades made me allergic to water—
as it did to the word fat
when the racks of clothes shunned 3XL in a different light.
I called myself manic, versed in recommending
where to eat—quantity and cheapness was the thing,
not quality.
Over the years my bedsheets
had worn to the shape of my slumber,
pillow cases frayed,
holes in my clothes
from how often I wore them.
I am over,
the habits

were killed

as soon as awareness awoke.

ANTHONY BROWN is an English student at the University of Cincinnati. His goal as a writer is to encourage others to never be afraid and to showcase their ugliness, truths, and personality through their writing. He is a poet, drag queen, music enthusiast, writer, and human. Anthony has interned for Abode Press and The Cincinnati Review. His work has been published in Prism Undergraduate Journal, Short Vine Literary Journal, The Persimmon Review, and elsewhere. Find him at anthonycbrown.com and Instagram @antwritesalot.

Cherubim

Photo by Tim Mossholder Promises tugged. Skin awaiting to be sawed. Free from the loose strangle of

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A Green Year

This story was originally published in The Headlight Review. It was a finalist for the 2024 Anthony

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Cherubim

Cherubim

Photo by Tim Mossholder

Promises tugged.

Skin awaiting to be sawed.

Free from the loose strangle of wandering.

Lonely, bellyrubbed, kissed

like Christ on rosary.

Each new Moon a stoning.

An oxymoronous gorge of tangles.

Oxidization of cerulean incense.

All altars melt in rapture

as feathers fall from the sun,

angry, nuzzled, blessed.

Descending from dawn

their fruits pendulant,

unfurled, throbbing,

a quartet of heads ordered in cardinal seductions,

four beasts brass engraved

with affinity for the forlorn violets your body

threading their maws,

sequestering adipose duvet.

Asphyxiating, the longing,

laying underneath sunlight in bare want,

ready for the taking.

Two hundred oculi

bestow the body in phantasmagoric lathe

erroneous & holy, holy, holy.

Oculi gyre across the body,

shoulders spin for the next head be tasted,

holding a lover over a belly full with seven breasts,

flaming, their swords

divinely procrastinate.

WYRD LEA was born of the bayou, cesspit squirming carcinogens and moss glint. They were a she, daughter, sister, plaything. They were, before all these things, a seed from an orchard of bad ass bitches. Now, they write. Follow their fundraising efforts to save a queer, disabled danmei author from incarceration they cannot survive due to severity of disabilities and updates on the anti-queer crackdown in China at @savedanmeiauthors.

Solstice

Shore Some women’s voices are heavy with stories of men who never make it home. Their oaths unbraid in unguessed fellowships, regions where fists circle shot glasses like shipwrecked souls reaching for shore. * In a diner

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Poem a Day for Chelsea Manning

Poem a Day for Chelsea Manning

During the last generation’s Western war on the Middle East, Chelsea Manning was incarcerated for disclosing secret documents that blew the whistle on US war crimes. She was incarcerated from 2010 until 2017 when President Obama commuted her sentence. She came out publicly as a transwoman on August 23rd, 2013. For the next twelve days, Z! wrote a poem a day to honor her courage in twice announcing powerful truths to the world.

August 23rd, 2013 

Chelsea Manning
Transforming
The landscape

Of war
And secrets

Imprisoned

For courage.

Secrets
Of her war

Of her landscape

Transforming.

*

August 25th, 2013 

Care Package

Enclosed:
Poems
flowers
sunshine
moon
lipstick: 5 shades
nail polish: 10 colors
concealer
eye liner
mascara
estrogen
a diary
wigs
2 bras
heels
dresses
sissters
scissors
a sledgehammer

*

August 27th, 2013 

They laughed
at a hunger striker
in
CA

when he asked for his meds

cuz, ha,
he was
breaking the rules

breaking
chains

breaking
solitary.

At Fort
Leavenworth

she
was breaking
the boxes

asking for
hormones

they denied

she existed

on the mens
block

locked inside
body

inside
cage

getting
free.

*

August 29th, 2013 

Gender
Identity
Disorder

=

Societal
Denial of
Gender Identity

=

The mask
so many have
worn

down the long
hallway
from
psychiatrist

to sunlight.

*

August 31st, 2013

Waiting
for congressional
oversight

one step

in a
direction
towards

reason

and increased
diplomacy

desperately
needed.

*

September 1st, 2013

You are not alone

we are not alone

we have always
been here.

Always.

At times
we have been
honored

simply
for being

who
we are

complex
and simple

crossing
boundaries

made up.

There
at the forefront
of stonewall
sparking
liberation

at the march
on washington

at both
wounded knees

disarming
Nukes

resisting
internment

there
helping catalyse
the DV
movement

then transforming the
DV/SA movement

we are here
coming out
undocumented and
unafraid.

Here changing the face
of queer liberation

We are here.

We are doctors
lawyers
teachers

we are
in the military.

We work at the store down the street

Dancers, singers, artists, bricklayers

We are everything
a kid wants to be
when
they
grow up.

And more.

*

August 24th, 2013
For Danni

There are
too many men
in womens prisons

too many women
in mens prisons

too many
that don’t fit
either

too many Black & Brown locked
away from home

too many
prisons
caging
this land.

*

August 26th, 2013 

Dear
President
Obama

you have a chance

to honor
a national shero

and do right
to the snowdens, assanges, and
mannings

who are pruning
your executive branch
hedges
for you

and us

so we can see
more clearly

the true possibilities

of a nation
covered
in
sometimes
smothering cloaks

of hope for change
and truth.

Communte
to time
served

and your branch
still
gets away
with
her torture.

*

August 28th, 2013 

I saw you
the other day

in the grocery store
pushing a cart

wearing a long flowing skirt.
You were looking down
reading a label

and your hair covered your face

but you pushed it back
behind your ear

and I could see your cheek
and eyes.

I saw you a few days ago,
you were

walking across the street
in the sun
laughing

holding hands with a
child
laughing.

You seemed so

free.

I saw you
just last night

on a date.

You were all
dressed up

a black dress

just the right
red lipstick
and nails

legs crossed,
glass of wine

dim lights

laughing
then sincere,

connecting

touching hands
across the table

naturally.

*

August 30th, 2013

Prayer
that something
stops
US intervention
in
Syria

and
civil war in
Syria
stops

to let children
grow,

like
lemon
lime and
olive
trees
in the wind,

adults to
live

full
lives

without
gas
bullets
and missiles.

More life
to live.

More
meze
kibbeh
hummus
shawarma.

More
Dabke
celebrating
birth and commitments
of love.

*

September 2nd, 2013

She

Chelsea

her

Chelsea

hers

Chelsea

Sometimes
it takes a lil
practice.

*

September 3rd, 2013

Assata Said:

if i know any thing at all,
it’s that a wall is just a wall
and nothing more at all.
It can be broken down.

Mumia Said:

“I spend my days
preparing for life,
not preparing for death…

They haven’t stopped me
from doing what I want
every day.

I believe in life,
I believe in freedom,
so my mind is not consumed
with death.
It’s with love,
life and those things.
In many ways,
on many days,
only my body is here,
because I am thinking

about what’s happening

around the world.”

Marilyn Buck Said:

later there was Assata’s freedom smile

then I was captured, locked into a cell of sewer water
spirit deflated. I survived, carried on, glad to be
like a weed, a wild red poppy,

rooted in life

Leonard Peltier Said (from Leavenworth):

Let who you are ring out and resonate
in every word and every deed.
Yes, become who you are…..

You are the message.

Z! HAUKENESS (they/them/their) grew up in rural Strum, WI, and lives in Louisville, KY (Shawnee Land). They are a somatics therapist, writer, akashic record’s reader, leadership coach, strategist, facilitator, ritual planner, and designer. They have published poems and articles on social movements, with more recent work incorporating spiritual and healing themes. They hold an MFA from Stonecoast at University of Southern Maine and are currently working on a biography about Carla Wallace.

“Metal Knee” and others

“Metal Knee” and others

Photo by Alexander Mass

Metal Knee

 

Yes, you piss me off when I attempt to extricate myself

from the car after a long drive and you’re stiff as the face

of an assistant principal scolding a habitual class-skipper.

 

Yes, my hobble to the gas pump – stiletto of pain spiking

from calf to hip – likely affords pity in others pulling up

in vehicles more luxurious.

 

Yes, I lumber pathetic on the freshman diamond, unable

to catch a fly ball or field a grounder unless my players

hit it directly at me.

 

Yes, my daily jaunt across the street with the dog when

the walk sign turns silver constitutes the maximum

distance I can actually run.

 

But know this, knee of titanium who alerts the TSA

agents to the potential of something amiss, who

necessitates my swallowing antibiotics an hour

 

before any dental appointment, who occasioned

this alabaster fishing-line scar – it is good for me

to understand I cannot stand fully on my own.

 

It is good for me to know I would wobble

and totter without your flex and lock beneath

my skin. I can be a cold storage refrigerator,

 

bolted and unforgiving. I can be a street sign

that weathers a hurricane even when pointed

in the wrong direction. I can be an eighteen-

 

wheeler thundering through a red light. You,

metal hinge attached to my organic strings,

remind me someone else managed to fix

 

something wrong within me. There was

a procedure. Someone with knowledge

I don’t own opened me up, got to work,

 

made me, if not

quite whole, pretty

dang close.

 

 

Outside School Today

 

My swollen knee swallows a pufferfish 

that seems earnestly interested in puffing. 

 

Stiff, sharp pains too. Every step down the stairs

feels like my 9th grade girlfriend broke up with me 

 

because I was too boring. You know what though? 

I suspect I’m doing pretty well for a dumbass 

 

who perched his school-issued laptop on the banister 

of said stairwell so he can tighten the drawstring 

 

so his shorts won’t fall down. Gravity, apparently 

pissed off at losing the comedy of a teacher’s pants 

 

plunging earthward, enacts its revenge when the laptop 

plummets two flights like the stock market after another 

 

puerile tariff threat and crashes to the floor with a stomach-

churning smack. Yes, indeed, the screen foments a Liberty 

 

Bell style crack, fissures as pathetically as our current 

democracy and, no, my heart does not flutter, stop, skip,

 

freeze, cease, or whatever the requisite response

is supposed to be despite the hard drive containing 

 

a 500-page unpublished novel, half of another, a million

lesson plans and perhaps seven thousand poems-in-progress.

 

Listen, a busted computer is a calamity, but the sky today

hovers with the kind of grey that beckons a salty New

 

England squall and I text our building’s Patron Saint

of Technology, whose name, no lie, sounds exactly

 

like Ready, and she texts back promptly with assurances

about a teacher’s loaner she will bequeath me tomorrow,

 

and a breeze growls like a courtside announcer clearing

his throat, pouncing on the microphone with a howl

– somewhere right now, in this country,

someone is being grabbed off the street

 

by masked men and delivered who knows where.

Somewhere across the globe a kid dies outside

 

a hospital padlocked when we tossed its funding 

into the woodchipper. Or filled the coffers

 

of another nation who bulldozed it. I’ve got trans

kids on my roster who feel like they could be 

 

murdered any day and their killer will be pardoned.

Someone needs to pray for my shattered computer.

 

I won’t.

 

 

Cambridge MA, March 2024

 

I’m there to watch my nephew sing

in his final undergraduate concert

and a dude in his group uncorks

a baritone that sounds like the rumble

of thunder before the boom, there is

a house in New Orleans and the next

day I’m still trembling from the sense

a shadow stalks the earth with shoulders

like cinder blocks and I can do nothing

to stem its advance even after a hearty

waffle and omelet and a walk around

the Charles River and a nap and I wake

 

to the Final Four, Iowa vs. UConn,

and Caitlin Clark stepping back

to drain a three, then another,

then a drive to the rim for a lay-up,

but it’s not her shooting that shakes

the tremors. It’s the pass that squirrels

through three defenders to an open

teammate, it’s the full-court hurl

that drops into the fingers of a sprinting

post player – it’s Paul Bunyan wielding

his axe, Jack conning his escape back

to his beanstalk, Serena Williams kissing

the bass line with an ace. Let’s not make

this about Angel Reese, a tenacious rebounder

deserving of her own hosannas. Let’s make

this about a Saturday afternoon in a hotel room,

about a body haunted to its marrow, and about

a woman banishing all the ghosts with a spin,

a sharp-eyed glance, an arrow nocked in her bow.

JEFF KASS teaches Tenth Grade English and Creative Writing in Ann Arbor MI. Recently named Poetry Editor at Dzanc Books, he’s the award-winning author of Knuckleheads, Independent Publishers Best Short Fiction Collection of 2011, as well as three full-length poetry collections including My Beautiful Hook-nosed Beauty Queen Strut Wave, and Teacher/Pizza Guy, a 2020 Michigan Notable Book and runner-up for Midwest Book Award. He is the winner of the 2024 Toledo Museum of Art Ekphrastic Poetry Contest, a featured poetry instructor with the Michigan Learning Channel, and 2023 Jack Hazard Fellowship recipient. His latest poetry collection, True Believer, spins around and through Marvel Comics and the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Alight in the South Field

Alight in the South Field

Photo by Roman Denisenko

alight in the south field

where the sky is bigger than you knew it could be wrapped above fields wrapped by woods north and west

scrub-pine and oak and home

for boar that once leered not fifty feet from your grandma – She didn’t have the dogs.

yet they turned and you think of that miracle often

how if they’d charged it would have been like the dream you had again and again back then—you frozen

in the doorway she in the yard and the buck knocking her back, bringing down hooves that took a chunk of dog not a year before down again down again down again

the hand that holds you trapped in dreams holds you, here as the only tree in the south field burns from the inside

in the grazing field, and the cows –

Herefords, rufous, lowing together

by the chain-cinched gate, stare not at the flames but the stock pond and its endless circling catfish

the pond is full this year and has always been

here before every summer becomes waiting for water, fish so thick you hook-catch their fins as they cram by (the year the pond dries from the other end of the phone you imagine them mounded, flabbed/still/flopping, cluck your tongue and pray for rain)

but it is not yet then, it is now, and you and yours herd around your grandma&pa, your siblings, uncles, dad

stand in grass to their knees, your waist, siblings’ shoulders watching the trunk windowed, a long unfolding joins again before it reaches root

flames held within burn but they must eat air

because the tree is still standing, they must be –

the fire cannot reach the branches and summer leaves encased as it is within the trunk—it cannot reach the green

now and now and forever a poem hangs on the wall of your grandparents’ house in fourth-grade cursive (except the capital letters)

on tracing paper layered on green construction paper facsimile of field and a scrapbook tree symmetric branches sporting oval bunch leaves

when your grandpa saw it glued on the poem about you and he morning deer-watching he knew it was the tree that now burns.

It does not burn like paper

but like there is something else doing the burning like it only holds the heat

outer bark pale and blackened at flame-window’s edges now

flames hot long enough there is only red and white and blackened bark within

the lightning struck unseen and early, the tree was burning when you awoke burning and it will be burning when you return tonight

though the fire will soften and glow the field around. Sporadic chatter about dousing it gave out hours before – nobody wants to stop this.

people peel off and return from chores or play

hauling or cooking or mule rides and someone takes a picture, somewhen, with a camera—you are still when cameras are better

years later, one of the easier stays

you will find the photo in a photobook

text it to the girl you are flirting with from school

look at this time the tree burned

she thinks it neat but sad, the only tree burning like that –

you walk to the field and take another (now phones are better than cameras)

of the tree, still hollow but budding,

explain it is something about how trees are more alive on the outside than the inside, how cored clean as an apple they still leaf out year after year a fire that burned but did not end

nobody wanted to stop this

This was not the first fire you saw in these fields

when the old mare was still alive there were

fireworks over the fields (your dad and his brothers’ doing)

up and out in a sky so full that stars and sparks reflected

and then fell into the north field, a great gout up and spreading

every man running whooping throwing water stamping it out great panicked laughter coming back to tell you, that’s why you always have a bucket of water ready!

you remember this, so many years later at the to-be-condemned with all the other children who lived so far from family

ready a bucket for fireworks in the parking lot (illegal as every lease)

everyone under the awning until a chrysanthemum misfires –

and all is stars and fire and hissing and gold

and all running and laughing that same terrified laugh

dumping the bucket bushes burning and stamping the rest and it is the same the same

stars and sparks reflecting, flames catching

on concrete and in the dirt, away and at home

laughter and terror and fire in the night and so much joy in danger kept small

The field fire, the fireworks, would have eaten the tree whole, now – nothing left to bud or keep beginning.

eaten fence and stable, woods scorched and leveled cows bellowing and bursting through barbed wire – but it was not so, back when the horse was alive there were rainstorms in the summer

you laid on the top bunk and listened to them swallow house and drench fields and rattle sheet-metal barn

summers not restricted to sparklers and poppers, quick-stampers

water left to run unhoarded –

the land was not yet tinder dry

Fires could be put out. Could be held inside a tree and you did not cry when you visited

the embers didn’t catch then, not as they would,

little torrents of flame burning each away from the other until you can only return to this memory of together, watching the tree burn and yet live.

EBEN THOMAS is a poet and writer living in Maine. He writes about animals, sometimes human ones. His work has appeared in The Word’s Faire and the Monster Beauties anthology.